Of being sleep deprived

 I have trouble sleeping off late. Too many things in my head especially my endless overthinking about my kids future and so on.

So i resort to watching dramas on tv. Dramas that i feel so connected and related. I made a comeback on watching Grey's Anatomy. Although the nudity part is a lot (surprisingly it doesn't excite me at all... i guess i'm too matured for that) but somehow i learn a lot from the plot about how people feel and how to tackle each problem a day. Most importantly, that series taught me to appreciate people that i love especially families and friends.

Yes, i can say i have a group of close friends that i have known them since my early days at University. How we had fun during our young and twisted days. We all have changed. Of course we become a better person. We care for each other and i pray every single day that our friendship doesn't end here... semoga sampai ke syurga

alright, i dont what else to write.

I hope i can come back here again tomorrow and write.

Writing is therapy,  writing makes me happy.

and happiness is free... u just got to find it.

Of Expending Family

I gave birth to a new tiny human again this year. During pandemic and it so damn hard! I want to write a lot of story about me giving birth without having my husband waving me goodbye before i went to the OR. But being a milkmaid limits my ability to express more in writing

Yeaaah... im 42 and i gave birth to my forth baby and he is so cute

Of Work That Pay Me

Susahnya bila kita terlibat dalam penentuan hukuman untuk kesalahan-kesalahan tatatertib ni. Rasa beratnya bahu memikul beban. Belum lagi aku jadi pengerusi... takat urus setia cabuk pun aduhai. Semoga tanggungjawab yang akan jalankan ini bukanlah yang menghumban aku ke rumah panas yang kekal itu.

Allahu humma ya barik, ya barik

Of Monologue

I realize that i have not been using the inferior frontal part of my brain so much after i get married. Yes i was busy with reproduction of human race, juggling with works and kids and all sorts of reasons i don't think would have enough space here to write it all. And that was like 12 years ago i have been abandoning my passion for writing and my english is practically berkarat sangat now that i get too slow even composing one good piece of a proper sentence!

So today, here I am. WRITING. Irregardless of my how lousy my English is, how slow my brain will be in writing down what i feel like writing... i decided to open up this space to avoid from my brain to further shrinking sampai jadi sebesar chia seed.

Semoga dipermudahkan.

Allahumma amin